delve a little deeper....
Yesterday was International Sex Workers Rights Day. I forgot to send any cards and nor did I get any but I was following the many tweets on Twitter about it including the
#whenantisattack hashtag. This was basically those tweeting about the general nastiness they have received, whether personally or collectively from those who are in the anti prostitution camp aka Feminists who really aren't. Do have a look at the link to see what kind of nonsense is spouted in the name of 'saving' women from prostitution and the kind of vitriol aimed towards those who have dared speak out.
Todays blog is inspired by Dr Brooke Magnanti (Belle de Jour) who has put up with a tonne and a half of crap and who posted this link on Twitter. It's a prostitution research website started by Farley and a 'hilarious' article by Melissa Farley and Nikki Craft. If you don't know any better, Farley is one of those 'feminists' who is radically opposed to prostitution and perpetuates the notion that all men who pay for sex are vile rapists and thinks that prostitution is a form of sex inequality related to gender-based violence yadda yadda...
Her refusal to accept there are many happy, well adjusted prostitutes in the world and those that claim to be are letting down all women is a concept that annoys many *insert rolled eyes emoticon*
Anyway, back to the link, have you looked at it yet? Well go on or else this won't make much sense. If you hadn't noticed the list of reasons why women become prostitutes is meant to be satire (I think).
It pissed me off, so I have in a counter attack listed my reasons based on her 18 point list.
I became a prostitute because . . .
1. I have never seen Pretty Baby and even I had I wouldn't confuse a 70's film set in New Orleans in 1917 with my own life. Also, my very conventional upbringing and amazing (non prostitute/pimp) parents has made me strong, grounded, independent and savvy therefore ideal for escorting.
2. I saw Pretty Woman again a few weeks ago, having forgotten it (oh, I'm so not easily led) and laughed a lot, and rolled my eyes and decreed it all bollocks.
3. I saw a Demi Moore movie and I thought, Wow, a shit film and nothing to do with prostitution, but something salacious to make a film about.
4. I like getting fucked by lots of men in a safe consensual environment because I get off on it and actually the men are really quite nice, and just happen to enjoy group sex. Note: Have never done this as an escort, only for fun because I choose not to.
5. I figured that laying on my back and getting fucked by hundreds of men, and getting on my knees and sucking thousands of dicks, was the most profound empowerment a woman could have. Yes, really, it's been incredibly liberating. Oh sorry were you being ironic Ms Farley? I'm not.
6. I've had a career elsewhere, circumstances changed and prostitution seemed the most rewarding job option available. Why would I want to go back to working for someone else 60 hours a week, a horrid commute and crap money?
7. I worship noone and still found myself in a life of sexual liberation.
8. I avoid men who see me as a piece of meat. I'm lucky enough to be able to make that choice and lets face it the Hugh Hefner's, Larry Flynt's, and Bob Guccione's of the world wouldn't want me!
9. My boyfriend wanted me to do it. He loves me and supports me and knew I'd make a good job of it.
10. My father doesn't discuss it with me but I know if I'm happy he is happy.
11. I have met loads of nice men. Yes really!
12. I believe feminism is very much about women making their own choices and therefore becoming a prostitute was the right thing for me to do.
13. It would pay my bills. Well, don't we all need to do that somehow?
14. I didn't want to work at some shitty job in a place I hated.
15. I get to be treated like a lady. And a slut depending on my mood.
16. I get to swank off to nice hotels and in my very limited capacity to feel glamorous this is when prostitution feels glamorous In fact I often say to friends from the back of a cab whilst off to a booking 'I'm having a Belle de Jour moment'!
17. Working in the sex industry would increase my self-esteem. I get told I am sexy, beautiful and lovely all the time. I am comfortable with my own sexuality and my body (mostly!) these days.
18. And then, ya know, even though it all sounded really good, and selling fucks and blow jobs sounded really empowering, I realised that talking about it, blogging about it and thinking about writing books defending it would be even more empowering.
There are more reasons, but am keeping in line with the list of doom.