delve a little deeper....
This will probably get me in trouble with the Olympic people who are trying so hard to preserve their brand. Of course I am deluded that anyone of import reads this blog!
Here goes- Went to see the Olympic Torch thing going through Hounslow today. It was hot, very hot, my toes got burned. It was crowded and some kid in a pushchair kept kicking me. To try and get me in the spirit I procured a balloon by pretending I had a child (they were only giving them out to kids). Waited for damn torch in the blistering heat, being kicked by child and imagining what my mythical child would be like. The mythical child that was at home with tonsillitis (I felt had to explain lack of child with me when procuring balloon). Mythical child has clearly inherited the bad tonsil gene which I then thought was a bit unfair. I suffered with mine for years and had to wait until the grand old age of 36 to have them taken out, after each infection getting gradually worse until they started to nearly kill me and a kind doctor had to fight with local hospital trust for them to agree to have have them removed. Anyway, I digress...
Finally something occurred, there was a man on a unicycle, two men playing some sort of Indian drums. there were lots of policemen, police cars and police motorbikes, people giving out blow up sticks, they might have been vaguely torch shaped, but I didn't get one because I am not a child. Mythical child would have got one I am sure, with her winsome smile, pretty blue eyes and long blonde hair.
Then a giant lorry with Coca-Cola appeared with dancing girls, then a Sumsung one with more dancing girls who has glittery cheerleader pom poms. Then another lorry with Lloyds TSB splashed all over it and more lithe youths jigging about. It all felt a bit corporate to be honest. The Lloyds girls were dishing out sticks with green ribbons attached. I didn't get one of them either.
Finally the torch appeared. I couldn't really see it because there were loads of people and I had been edged out of my spot by the pushchair and I was almost dying of heat exhaustion. It was quite nice in a way, the lad carrying it looked so happy and thrilled and people were ridiculously over excited and enthused. Probably because they were non mythical children with a selection of balloons, whistles, blow up things and ribbons.
Anyway, the best bit was the mascot. He is a photo:
You know how everyone went on about the Olympic 2012 logo looking like Lisa Simpson giving a blow job (its all I can see when I see it now) well don't you think this cute and cuddly mascot looks like a penis?
Mythical child is now disturbed.