delve a little deeper....
What every girl really needs in life is cock and chocolate so who could resist buying a Clone a Willy making kit? Not me for sure- I got mine from here.
Luckily I had a willing volunteer, well I say willing volunteer; I mean a man who is tolerant of my whims and mad ideas....
So, basically to make the mold you have to cut a plastic tube to the length of the penis. Cue step one of unerotic process. The tube needed to be cut in half- not the most flattering thing for a chap to see, but I reassured him the tube had to start out large to hold all the parts of the kit and was not an expectation of willy size.
You then have to have water at exactly 98 degrees, the kit comes with a handy thermometer. Once you have the right temperature you put the water into a mixing bowl and add the powder that comes with the kit to make a gloopy porridge like consistency. The instructions are very clear that once you have mixed it you only have two minutes to pour it in the tube and insert the willy. The idea is that it creates a mold that you then pour in melted chocolate.
So I summon the man who is sitting patiently in the lounge with his hard willy. Only it isn't anymore. Clearly me wielding a wooden spoon and giggling about the part of the instructions that tell you what to do if you have a bendy cock is not erotic. Or maybe it was the prospect of putting his cock into a plastic tube full of warm gunky stuff that wasn't inviting....
Possibly me looking at it saying 'Why isn't it hard?' didn't help or me staring at Mr Floppy saying 'What's wrong with it?!' wasn't sexy. Or maybe it was me snapping 'Come on, get it hard!' wasn't the foreplay a man enjoys. I tried to mix the batter in an erotic manner, but that didn't seem to work as he stood tossing his cock naked in my kitchen. Oh and then we bickered over using a whisk over a wooden spoon. I think he thought we were making pancakes.
Knowing time was ticking on I thought I had better take the matter in hand and got to my knees to give him a little mouth to cock assistance. Happily that seemed to work and I got up to pour the mixture into the tube. But alas! It has already stated to set and my mixture was not a runny consistency anymore, more like a grey jelly. I bashed it about with a spoon (the mixture, not the cock). This is what I ended up with.
I decided to pop it in the microwave to see if that would melt it back to a pouring consistency again. 'Don't put it in for too long!' he said nervously clutching his penis! After removing from microwave all I had was warm lumpy mess so, sadly I am still chocolate willy-less. I do however have the chocolate left so I may just eat that to console myself with.
Of course after awesome blow job and a now raging hard on we had to go and have some rather spectacular sex to make up for the disappointment....