delve a little deeper....
It's been a while since I have blogged and a while since I really talked about my services and what I do as an escort. I winder if sometimes this blog loses it's way a bit as a marketing tool, or letting potential clients actually find out what I am about and the kind of things I offer as an escort.
I am ditheirng with starting another blog to cover the sex work activism, political stuff and general rantings. Not sure yet, so if you have any thoughts feel free to share them.
For now here's a link to the blogs and pages regarding my services for those who are new to this blog, or are browsing the interwebs for a nice escort...
Roleplay- I love roleplay. I have had some wonderful clients who enjoy this both as a regular thing and one off bookings. I wrote a blog about Roleplay (link) a couple of years ago so I think it's worth linking again in case you were looking for inspiration and if you have found me after Googling 'Roleplay Escort' (I know from my stats that this is fairly common!)
Anal Play- Anal play is a bit like Marmite in my experience! Men seem to either love it or hate it or at least hate the idea of it! THIS is one of my most read pages so I know plenty of chaps are intrigued if anything! There's nothing more satisfying than introducing a client to the joys of anal play. It doesn't have to include actual penetration, often a little teasing is enough to add an extra thrill to a session! I wrote about anal play and fisting HERE if you want to know more!
Female Ejaculation- Often known as squirting or gushing. There is still much debate about this, but I can assure you it is real and not just clever porn or indeed women weeing! I'm not the most prolific squirter but I can do it with the right stimulation and have definitely experienced a few of other women who have soaked me with their juices! THIS is a long piece with a bit of science and history as well as my very own personal journey.
Still not convinced?- Well why not read THIS- It's a guide for men (and women) who might not have taken the plunge to make a booking or are unsure of the protocols of booking an escort.
So there you go- if there is anything you'd like clarifying about sex, my services of have any questions please feel free comment here or drop me an email to firstname.lastname@example.org. Suggestions for blog posts are always welcome to!
I have never been a massive fan of camming if I'm really honest. Not because I don't like getting my bits out and playing with myself for the pleasure of a man (or woman) via webcam (cos I really do!) it's all the sitting about waiting for someone to appear that I find dull and demoralising! Or that thing where people look at you for 3 seconds and then leave making you think 'Oh, so he didn't fancy me!' :( The other thing was, if it was busy in a group session it'd get really confusing as what to do if multiple people were asking different things or if someone said Oh please go put a pair of red pants on I'd do so only to come back and find he had logged out. Frankly, the whole thing was a pain in the arse.
However, it was hit upon after conversation with Sarita that what I could do was offer camming bookings via Skype. This way clients can make actual bookings for a specific time and with requests for outfits or how they want things to go in the same way as making a real life booking! They'd get a private session with noone interrupting and exactly what they want from me!
So I have set myself up the webcamming/Skype bit on Adultwork so click the link and have a look!
You need to pay credits via adultwork which means registering, but it's pretty simple and safe as far as I have experienced.
So for those of you who live too far away to come and play or haven't the time to get over, or if you're nervous about booking why not book a quick cam session to break the ice why not book a camming session for a gossip or some super sexy cyber sex?!
I think it's a perfect win/win solution to my camming frustrations! :)
One of the things I often ask callers booking me is if they have any requests. It's a polite way of trying to figure out what they want from their booking so I can prepare in advance or advise them in case it's something I don't offer.
To be fair, most chaps are after a basic GFE service or if they have a specific service or roleplay in mind they talk to me about it during the call.
When it comes to what to wear I have several outfits I tend to put on as standard based on what most chaps want. Always stockings (or hold ups), heels and usually short and low cut skirt and top. Partly because they are easy and most men when questioned prefer heels and stockings and something a bit slutty. The usual way of being asked for slutty is to say 'something low cut to show your boobs off!' which I like. I'm not exactly shocked that it's often my tits that draw a man to me! That and my sparkling personality and witty repartee!
Despite many of my photos being of me in basques and corsets I rarely actually get asked to wear these which is fine by me. They tend not to lend themselves easily to certain services such as breathing or bending over. That's not to say I won't wear them if asked, as long as it's in advance. Nothing more annoying than being texted ten minutes before a meeting being ask to wear a corset. In fact being asked to wear anything that I am not currently wearing at such short notice is annoying!
I get the odd request for leather, latex, PVC or rubber which surprises me because I don't feature any of these items on my website of photographs. I also equate this kind of fetish wear to domination services which I don't do so it always makes me worry they want something I'm not about to provide.
I am also not overly comfortable with the rubbery type get ups because quite frankly I look like a giant tyre in my rubber dress. I remarked to the man who bought it for me when I tried it on that he could chuck me out the window and I'd bounce right back up again! He found me sexy though, but then again he is terribly biased. So, I don't advertise the rubber dress (Oh shit, I just have haven't I?) Also, I'm not sure I can actually get into it without help!
i suppose the point being, however hot someone might find me, if I don't feel good in an outfit then I don't feel sexy and let's face it sexual confidence from a woman is probably what makes her sexually appealing.
What does always make me smile, is when clients ask me to 'wear something sexy'. As if I wouldn't. As if I would open the door in a pair of grubby leggings and a floppy old top with beans spilled down the front. Although from reading various punting sites, some women don't seem to make any effort and clients have been welcomed by escorts in shell suits and flip flops.
Many lovely clients feel uncomfortable about asking a woman to wear something in particular and often requests are tagged with 'if that's ok' or 'it's not vital though' or 'whatever you feel comfortable in' which is lovely and sweet but I actually really don't mind being asked. Partly because it's their experience and I want to do it the best I can and also it appeals to me slightly submissive side. Bossy and mouthy as I can be there is a part of me that likes being told what to do. That and I'm lazy and being told means I don't have to think!
I guess it's the same reason many powerful, busy, successful people enjoy being submissives. They like to be able to relinquish control and not be the one everyone looks to to make decisions.
Anyway, I digress. The point being, I don't mind being asked if I could wear a certain thing. Within reason of course. I am not the costume department at the BBC and can not conjurer up any outfit in any colour within minutes!
Something I often read on escorts websites is that they don't have costumes and then go on to say they dislike tacky cheap uniforms. Fine, but why be so sneering about it? I don't have many, and to be honest I do find a lot of them a bit naff, but I feel good and have had great fun in my nurse and French Maid outfits.
Maybe, part of the reason is that I enjoy roleplay a lot and I guess like an actor getting into their costume; dressing up gets me into the mindset!
So, in a nutshell, do feel free to suggest what you'd like me to wear (as long as it's not the rubber!).
I get asked sometimes whether I do dirty talking. I'm afraid I probably usually answer 'Um er, yes I can do...' which probably isn't dreadfully convincing for the man asking. Well, I shall let you into a secret. I'm actually not very confident at this aspect of the job! I'm not exactly a shrinking violet and I have plenty of naughty words in my vocabulary as well as a penchant for being talked dirty to as well. Maybe it's the submissive side of me who quite enjoys being told I'm a dirty slut...
However it's context. If a man calling out of the blue opens the conversation with 'Are you a filthy whore?' the chances are I will hang up and block his number cos that's just not polite! However after meeting someone and figuring out they are nice and normal with a fondness for such talk I will feel more comfortable and quite likely probably quite enjoy this kind of session. Seriously, if you do it properly I be be dripping wet before I've even been touched.
But that's them doing the talking.... what about me doing it?
Well, it's really difficult when you don't know someones preferences for language. I have met men who have recoiled at my using the C word (just as I recoil at the word fanny! yuck yuck!) and I have met men who look all sad if I refer to myself in any way other than as an escort and tell me "but you're not a prostitute/whore/hooker/ trollop/ wench/whatever, you're not "like" that. Which is sweet I guess.
A man simply asking me to talk dirty is a minefield. It's why I don't offer a Porn star experience (PSE) as part of my repertoire I feel daft doing all that silly squealing and panting and 'fuck my hole big boy!' type thing. It's all fake. yes, maybe some men like the whole pretendy porny thing, but it's just not me.
The main problem I have when asked to talk dirty is not where to start, it's how to keep going and how far to go. Once you've said 'fuck my cunt' or 'suck on my titties' a few times it gets repetitive. What else is there? There are only so many variation of the term fuck and vagina and let's face it, it can get a bit daft 'Put your meat cleaver in my love tunnel' 'Go on bang my muff harder you saucy stud?'...
Then there's really mucky stuff that whilst I might not be adverse to in my private life I just simply don't do with clients so that rules out demanding they 'fill my hole with your hot spunk' or 'Ram it up my poohole hot stuff', 'Let me taste your creamy nob juice'. One has to be careful not to mention something you don't actually want them to do.
Then there's stuff that you don't want to give ideas to clients. 'Let me be your slut, bring all your mates round to use me!' might lead a man to think he could do that on our next meeting (he can't!) and that brings me onto the main problem I have with dirty talk.
Knowing what they want. I could happily talk about gang bangs or being taken to the pub and being screwed in the loo by the local football team (this hasn't happened, but I am very good at making stuff up and possibly this kind of thing may be sitting in my wank bank...) but for some men the idea of sharing me or thinking about any women in this way would be repulsive and feel misogynistic and disrespectful.
I have a client who likes being told as I use a dildo on his that one day I'm going to get a real cock to pound his arse and he loves it, it really gets him off, whereas a man who has zero bi tendencies might end up with Mr Floppy and a fear for his bottom. It is much easier when you know what makes a man tick and with someone you don't know very well it's really tricky.
So, when a man suddenly announces I should dirty to him, I do flounder and wonder what I can say and how far I can go. In an ideal world a man would suggest to me in advance what kind of thing does it for him. Planning to incorporate it into a roleplay works well for me, and many of my clients. When you're acting out a role and in a 'place' that isn't real it gives much more scope and feels more safe.
What I'm really good at is stories. Rather than being told to talk dirty aka bellow out obscenities I find story telling works really well. It makes it feel more structured, has the added delight of anticipation and both parties can join in and the man can help the story along by pointing me in the direction he wants the story to take and have me vocalise what he wants to visualise. For example the lots of men in a pub story.
Me: Well I walk into the pub...
Him: I bet you had a really low cut top on like a right slut
Me: Yes, my tits were practically hanging out and I had a short skirt on.
Him: And no knickers?!
Me: Of course not, if I bent over then they'd all be able to see my pussy
And so on. The same principle can be applied to any scenario of course- me and my first girl on girl encounter, me and the policeman who arrested me then fucked with his truncheon in a cell or the time I seduced a train driver in his cab (the last two will be made up!) or indeed whatever a man chooses. I'm sure most men can suspend disbelief for the sake of a naughty, yet highly improbably story! I suppose it's a great way to do roleplay without anyone having to act or dress up!
Here is a story, based on actual events between my good self and a lovely lovely client who wanted to dabble into the world of roleplay. He emailed me suggesting that he play the part of an insurance assessor coming round to valuate some rather intimate items of mine...
Lydia gets her assets assessed...
As the owner of some very fine assets I was very keen to get them looked over by an expert, have them valued and hopefully have them insured over loss or damage. As you can imagine I possess some fine pieces of great value and essential in my line of work.
As great fortune would have it I received an offer from a fine London establishment to send a valuations specialist to my humble abode to look over my wares. Here is an excerpt from our email communications:
Here at Koch & Spankmeyer we understand that every one of our clients has a personal and idiosyncratic collection of items that they treasure. It is our privilege to offer peace of mind about their preservation and value. Throughout our long history -- our firm has been providing insurance since 1869 -- we have always sought to offer complete satisfaction, no matter how individual the items our clients possess may be.
Rest assured our representative has been meticulously trained in providing the very highest levels of personal care while at all times maintaining utter professionalism and a single-minded focus on your needs.
Koch & Spankmeyer, Insurers
"Your assets will be in good hands with us"
I was of course reassured by the tone of the letter as well as the longevity of this esteemed organisation of Koch & Spankmeyer and eagerly awaited the gentleman who was tasked with uncovering my finest treasures.
Soon enough the day arrived and I dressed carefully for my meeting. One likes to give a good first impression and as I knew that some assets would require close inspection I wanted to ensure my insurance man was presented them in the best light.
On arrival I was greeted by a pleasant gentleman, clearly refined and an expert in his field. He gave me a brief history of his company and by good fortune mentioned that they have clients who insure body parts, for example a guitarist who has his thumb insured.
This made it easy for me to introduce the first item I wished to have insured. I told him that I was very interested in having my fine breasts insured. Such a gentleman he was, he didn't look phased and soon held my assets in his hands weighing them carefully. I suggested that maybe he would like a closer look to really appreciate their value and began to undo my blouse buttons. Such wonder was upon his face as I revealed my full, rounded globes. He nuzzled his face into them taking them in carefully, I could tell he was enjoying the evaluation immensely!
As an expert should, he asked if he could get a closer look, so I swiftly lifted my breasts out of the silky bra cups. His hands were on them immediately and the sensation of his thumbs running over my nipples was a delight. As part of the detailed evaluation process he sucked on my hard nipples, squeezed my bosoms together and exclaimed with delight at the wonders. I'm not ashamed to admit that I was rather excited by both his touch and enthusiasm.
However, we had a lot to get through so I invited him through to my boudoir....
Part Two coming up later....
As you should know if you've been reading this blog I do enjoy a bit of roleplay. It's something I enjoy doing with both clients and lovers and I wish I got to do more of it!
Apart from it being fun I think there are some very good reasons why this kind of fun works for so many people.
a) fulfilling a fantasy that you couldn't actually do in real life. Or at least close to the fantasy.
b) being someone else is always a good thing to do for a while. In some cases the use of roleplay can make bring out the confidence in a shy person.
c) having a scenario to work through may delay the hands on touchy sexy part of a session and we all know foreplay is a good thing. For me, the build up is a massive turn on.
d) It's fun! It can be a giggle and it's something different to the usual and hey if you get to laugh as well as get laid it can't be a bad thing.
So, deciding on what scenario to do. You may already have one in your head or have a fantasy already in which case it can easily be converted into your roleplay. The common one I get asked to do a lot is the slutty secretary one. I guess it's because guys see gorgeous women at work that they'd like to do rude things with and well, it wouldn't be appropriate to actually ask Miss Jones to take down her knickers instead of notes to a meeting. I think the 'secretary' thing covers a generic workplace fantasy, and has a better ring to it than slutty HR manager or slutty IT support girl! Although both those work in a roleplay scenario. getting called to HR to explain absence and persuading her to let you off if you give her some awesome oral sex or taking advantage of the IT girl late at night whilst um... rebooting severs (or whatever it is IT people do after dark).
Other common themes involve bored 'housewives' and callers whether it is the estate agent, insurrance man or pizza delivery boy. Again, I think for men it's about the fantasy of meeting a woman in a professional capacity but unable to actually do anything about it in reality. The French Maid which don't actual exist in reality really, but the outfit is cute, but a room service girl who spills soup on you and needs to remove your clothes and 'apologise' in a special way is always fun!
Other popular ones are Dr/patient, student/teacher, police officer/criminal (or just someone wanting to get out of a parking fine and one high on my list butler/maid!
Age play can be great fun too, but not everyone finds them comfortable. I personally believe a man who enjoys spanking a naughty school girl in roleplay doesn't actually want to do bad things to actual children. If he did he would be lurking around school gates and not engaging with 36 year old me in a fancy dress school tie!
In the same way a man who enjoys being seduced by his much older next door neighbour or best friends mum is unlikely to actually do it in real life!
More basic less defined roles can also be used. The beauty of roleplay is that you can be anyone anywhere and it doesn't have to be complicated and doesn't have to be about one person taking advantage or seducing the other (although these are the ones I like most) they can be as simple as a couple meeting up in a bar, flirting and then having wild sex in an alleyway - all without leaving your front room, although this one can be done in a real pub if you like!
The more quirky of you may have other fancies- alien lands on earth and wants to screw earth woman? Cave men and women who only communicate in grunts (although not sure I could do this without laughing) although this may be of inspiration to you! . Although the idea of being dragged by my hair to a cave is quite appealing!
Talking to some chatroom dwellers, I got some of their ideas (I thought getting a male perspective would be useful). H said:
"I used to have this fantasy of being in some kind of medical programme. I go to a clinic, where the girls treat me like meat, they just want to extract my jism (darn sexy girls in revealing medical gear)"
Other suggestions included off duty copper coerces a woman to avoid speeding fine, seducing someone you work with, being a sex slave to a group of busty girls, screwing a lollypop lady (?!), being seduced by a sexy GP doing a medical and being a taxi driver having a girl pay her fare in sexual favours.
It seems that most people do tend to like like the abuse of power or authority to be part of the roleplay. I assume this is because not only in reality you can't go round seducing random people but because deep down many people like the idea of having power over someone, or conversely a strong in-control person sometimes wants to be submissive and yielding to another. But we're getting into the dom/sub area now which is another blog for another day.
So, my checklist on a successful roleplay.
1. Decide what does it for you. See above for ideas!
2. Decide who does the seducing/taking advantage of who. In my experience one person is more dominant than the other. I don't mean dominant in a BDSM manner, although of course if that's your bag it can involve kinkier elements. I think one half of the couple being less keen than the other is a good tool to extend the session and build up the sexual tension. There's no point telling a woman you want to do a student/teacher roleplay if she is expecting to be taken advantage of and you expect her to be a slut who comes on to her teacher! So, simply you need to establish who is pushing and who is giving.
3. Don't over complicate by having scripts or long lists of details, but I think key elements need to be communicated and understood. There is as danger of someone getting in a tizz because they can't remember their lines, added pressure won't help.
4. Discuss and agree how fast you want the action to go. Someone will be let down if they think they are getting a long session with lots of teasing and seduction if the other just comes in throws her over the sofa yelling 'Pizza delivery!' as he rams his pepperoni up her within 30 seconds!
5. Don't give up. If one of you gets the giggles or gets struck dumb don't throw it in. Have a laugh and carry on. It's meant to be fun, you're not auditioning for RADA.
6. Dress the part if you can. No need for expensive and elaborate outfits or a props department that would put the BBC to shame, but a few touches makes it fun and keeps the focus. Remember my estate agent with a clipboard and tape measure?! Brilliant!
7. Don't be disappointed if the other person doesn't react how you want them to. It's very easy to say something and expect a reply or response, but unless you are very close or telepathic the other person won't know what you want. Throwing a hissy fit and screaming 'Noooo, you weren't meant to say that!' spoils the mood!
Talk about it afterwards.
8. You don't have to keep it up all night (chance would be a fine thing, boom boom!), the roleplay I mean... In my experience once the actual full on shagging bit starts it tends to peter out! But that's fine!
9. Talk about it afterwards (if it's with a regular partner, no need if it was a one off!), be honest, but not brutally critical, acting skills shouldn't be brought onto question!
10. Practice makes perfect and once you get to know what your partner likes and what works for you you can really start pushing some boundaries!
Yet another awesome roleplay at the weekend. This time I was a headmistress complete with tight blouse, long skirt and boots! In fact I have a quick snap of boots which I shall add below this entry!
My student was very naughty and had not remembered his uniform so I lent him a white shirt and a school tie!
Once ready he was called into my office to explain his behaviour in class. It turns out he was being disruptive because he had heard I was a slutty teacher who gave special treats to students who needed an incentive to work harder! By the end of the session he had certainly experienced all the treats a girl could give!