delve a little deeper....
The problem of having your phone number on the internet, especially accompanied by details of sexual services and photos in your scanties is that it does encourage calls from those who want to get their kicks or consider you as a free dirty chat service. It's an unperk of the job, dealing with phone wankers and timewasters.
However, you get used to it to a degree and after a while you can spot the telltale signs fairly quickly... Here is my top ten of lines that indicate a man is actually wanking into his sock or has no intention of making a booking.
1. "My internet/wifi isn't working so I'd like some details"
Oh the first thing you did was write my number down before reading anything or looking at my gallery and then your wifi vanished? You really should be onto your internet provider.
2. "My wife and I are looking for a threesome, but she's not here now"
Of course she isn't! She either doesn't exist or knows nothing about this threesome which also exists only in your head.
3. "I'm looking for a regular girl to see once a week."
No you're not. You're trying to get a discount or think this will make me work harder to impress you.
4. "I'm a big lad, would you like to see a photo?"
Invariably a refusal is ignored and lo and behold a cock appears. I know what a cock looks like. I am not impressed, I've seen nicer. Send it to your mother if you're looking for approval.
5. "Can I come and see you in 15 minutes, where are you based?"
How do you know you can get to me in 15 minutes? Also your assumption that I am sitting around in my best pants awaiting your call annoys me.
6. "I've never seen an escort before, do you do OWO and reverse oral and are extras included?"
Oh but you know all the terms that only hobbyists use? No actual man refers to giving oral sex as reverse oral and anyway it's not reverse oral, it's the right way around oral!
7. "What services do you do?"
So you've managed to find my phone number, yet somehow missed all the words I have written about what I offer and expect me to list everything I might possibly do in a booking? I think not.
8. "I'd like to book you for an overnight"
You can't even say hello, we've never met before, I don't advertise overnight bookings and when I quote you £5,000 you agree. This ain't happening.
9. "May I ask what your breast size is please"
You're politeness doesn't fool me. You've seen the photos and you can't tell the difference between a 36D and a 40G anyway. You just get off on hearing two seeming random letters and numbers said outloud.
10. Schlip shlap schlop
I CAN HEAR YOU WANKING!!!!